disclaimer or something

A mummy-hand holding, (former) biker gang affiliating, hippie influenced semi crunchy granola mom's ramblings and reminisings on an off-kilter life

Monday, June 11, 2012

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

It was like Texas Chainsaw Massacre except replace chainsaw with semi truck, and Texas with Canada.

So I was hunted down, in a game of tag, by a semi truck once, and nearly didn't make it. True story. So I dated a Canadian once (a whole 'nother story) and we were getting a rental car or tickets for a bus or something, to go to Tofino, a rainy tourist spot. The way we got there escapes me because while waiting for tickets or a car, I got bored and decided to wander the parking lot. I vaguely recall I was hungry and foraging for food. No, I wasn't eating wild dandelions in the sidewalk cracks or hunting lizards or even dumpster diving, just looking for a 7-11 for twinkies or something.

Car Stopper curb thing- the boy here
is doing something to it. I'm including a photo
to differentiate it from the other, grassy kind of
parking lot curb,
Anyways. I was wandering the parking lot, all alone, at some crappy time like 6am, when I heard a loud sound behind me and saw a semi truck navigating the parking lot. Except that he wasn't navigating, he was HEADED TOWARDS ME. Ok, I thought, I mean he has to leave the parking lot to go somewhere, so he has to drive through it, fair enough. So I hopped those parking lot car stopper curb things, except this one was only a curb thing and didn't have the bonus grassy curb...just more parking lot. The truck freaking TURNED MY WAY and sped up and I became nervous because the direction I was going was NOT THE EXIT of the parking lot. So I kinda ummm ran really fast towards the bus or car place, and the truck CONTINUED MY DIRECTION for a moment before doing a lengthy trucker U-turn and exiting the parking lot as if he weren't trying to run me over. I was so freaked out because I was being stalked by a 20,000 lb deadly weapon driven by a mad man that I forgot how I even got to Tofino. And my boyfriend didn't exactly freaking believe me, and since it was 6 am on a Tuesday or whatever, no one else saw it, so had he killed me, no one would have been their to try and save me or hunt him down or whatever.

And the worst part? That song by Len, Steal My Sunshine, was stuck in my head on a continual loop repeat as I was running for my life, and I thought, I don't want to die with this damned song in my head.

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