disclaimer or something

A mummy-hand holding, (former) biker gang affiliating, hippie influenced semi crunchy granola mom's ramblings and reminisings on an off-kilter life

Friday, June 15, 2012

Okie lovin' and Misery

Misery's very own, one of many, adult superstore
downtown OKC

falling apart downtown OKC

Fine hotels here in Oklahoma

Oklahoma is actually really pretty, see?

hehehe hehehe

Them Missouri folk done stole muh water it sez that this here
water aint no ozark water as it done claim but this water
be from ca-lee-fornia, right wheres I done live.
Its Arrowhead water in Ozark clothing

The mighty mighty Missouri Ozarks
So first, our motorhome was sent to a new location where they couldnt really fix it and we had to wait an hour for the rv place to call and send us buack to the original location, joy. We then get a rental car and empty the rv so it is noon when we leave Oklahoma City but we stop at a Walmart to get a shoe.l..ok a pair, because I cannot find my son's left shoe. Of course I find it after buying the shoes. Our renter's wife is ill, we send condolences and work things out. It is past one. We have what 11 hours orf 13 or something to go? Oh. Oklahoma and Montana Walmarts both sell camoflage lingerie, I am highly amused. So we head to Tulsa and stop for lunch. Who knew Waffle House played no blasted Ja Rule and talked about banging some ho who was hot and hoofing it cross town to come to Waffle House right now? Oh and we met her,skunk colored hair, short shorts, and pregnant. She was Tulsa hot. yuck. So then we enter Missouri which I will pronounce misery. We are barraged by Adult Store billboards and stores with arcades and men's spas which truly disturbs me. The Bible Belt with sexy arcades? Suuuuuure. We wonder, too, have these folks never heard of the internet where that stuff is free? And what is an arcade or spa at those places? Is Misery full of pervs? Then I see a billboard for the worlds largest candy store- theory confirmed. We stop for gas at a kum and go (insert fifth grade style humor/laughter here) and whoa, suddenly "you might be a redneck if..." becomes so relevant. Everyone has a mullet, beard, beer belly, unibrow. The car next to us, getting gas, is full of cigarette smokers, at the gas pump. flames next to flammables. There are swastikas in the restroom. There are antique stores that have stuff that...hmm...so in the California desert people collect cars and appliances in their yard and have peremanent yard sales. When these items get too old =, rusty, and destroyed, they die and go to junk heaven aka Missouri. The junk is stuff people into junk would not want. There seem to be sex shops and "antique swap meets" and a kum and go at every exit. And billboards for knives. And candy. And fireworks supermarkets, supermarket sized fireworks places. Hubby says the fireworks help with population control. Missouri is like a 7 deadly sins meets hilbilly haven death trap.

1 comment:

  1. I love this post! Misery seems like it would give you hours of stuff to write about! And who dosnt love looking at freaks?