where the heck is my turret?

So my family went to Target to walk around because when it is 109 out and smoggy it is a little bit too scorching and asthma-deadly out to go for an evening walk. So we pass by the clothing and I am again apalled by the new fashions which proves I am a way uncool crotchedy old lady in her 30s too fashionable, have too good of taste. It is like the faahionistas took a time travel machine and found the ugliest, frumpiest, wouldn't wear that to a dog fight fashions from teach fashion era, threw in some sequins, threadbaren cloth, and some convalescent home fashions and claimed it to be fashionable. Serioisly, 1980s couch fabric skinny jeans? A light pink polyester windbreaker looking cardigan with sequins?----------------------------------------anyways, I spotted many atrocious styles and stopped to fully observe a faded, been through the wash 1000 times sweater that had rough worn edges and loose threads poking out. I am so not going to pay $30 for something Goodwill would say was too worn. So I said to hubby. ME: seriously? Look at the shoddy wuality! It is like hobo chic except I think hobos wouldsay it is too worn out to wear. Ugh. HUBS: well it is just very Mad Max esque (btw google the movie if you're all, Mad Max, what is that?) ME: Well it sucks. But wait if it is Mad Max, (myvoice getting louder) where the heck are the Mad Max cars? I want a turret on my Subaru. A turret darnit, wouldn't that be awesome? (A stranger glances my way and gives me the you're psycho look) yeah where the heck is my turret? ---------------------and that folks is why I probably should not be allowed in public