disclaimer or something

A mummy-hand holding, (former) biker gang affiliating, hippie influenced semi crunchy granola mom's ramblings and reminisings on an off-kilter life

Friday, January 18, 2013

Potty patrol

Being pregnant, you are to drink at least 64oz of water a day. And your uterus etc are pushing on your bladder, making your bladder have the intake of an elephant with the capacity of a mouse.

Basically, you pee a lot.

Teachers cannot just "go" as needed as you cannot leave students unsupervised. You are a prisoner of the clock and must "go" on schedule. This for me means after each two hour long class, I try and scoot the kids out and make a mad dash trough the slower than cattle to the slaughter halls to the staff restroom.

Today I opened the door to find... The sub across the hall, "going". Umm who does NOT lock the door to a public restroom? So I waited as the beginning of school loomed. Five minutes later I gave up and suffered, doing the potty dance, for two hours. Then I rush and guess what? SHE is there so I wait. Again. Not five minutes thank God. This happens a THIRD time.

School ends and I'm ready for my hour drive home and the restroom is out if toilet paper. I blame her. So I make the trek to a different restroom across campus and all is well. I return to my room to grab my purse and lock up and I see her made a frantic dash to the bathroom near us. I smirk, nearly cackle, and dance a victory dance in my mind as she dashes towards the bathroom with NO toilet paper. Vengeance is mine! Muh ha ha! Enjoy wiping with toilet seat covers you bathroom hog!!!

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