disclaimer or something

A mummy-hand holding, (former) biker gang affiliating, hippie influenced semi crunchy granola mom's ramblings and reminisings on an off-kilter life

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Today sucked

It sucked hairy rocks.
It sucked goat hairs.
It sucked suckier than suck.

My son only ended up in daycare half the day yesterday, Hubby had to pick him up, he was beyond inconsolable.
I ended up taking him to the doctor,'/s and he was diagnosed with thrush.

So today sucked cause my son was in daycare from11-4 and cried basically the entire time. When not hysterically crying, he was clicking things to escape or body slamming things. He seriously is covered in bruises and it breaks my heart. So I researched the issue and the trusty Internet is all, some kids just never adjust. They just can't be in daycare. Great. No one ear can watch him.

So work....really sucked. It began on and then the students enter the room. We begin note taking and the laptop freezes. Then the projector overheats. 30 minutes wasted. No alternative assignment cause I had to teach that topic today or else, and I do not have a textbook or any materials yet. So it was PowerPoint or nothing. So the students are then crazy afterwards cause its all, hi I am your new teacher and hey look at that umm...since noting works, and I cannot give other work , sit there for a half hour.

So I am beginning to learn names but with up to 38 per class, yes, 38, and kids purposely tricking me and switching seats, I am f&ked.

So then we have another class. A little better except one kid will not sit down. With absences and the like, he is one of three names. He won't tell me which is his and no one else will. He refuses to take out the note book. I can't sent him elsewhere or write him up since I do not know who he is.

Everyone talks over my voice or any student presenting anything.

They only get grades for tests and essays and even then, specific ones so I can't give a pop quiz or essay or other shut up assignment. Cause they won't do it.

So then there's a fire drill with a confusing map. 2,000 students or mor plus staff exit two doors. It is a log jam situation and classes separate due to simple physics. My class loses me and vice versa. In the swarm, I have no clue who my students are since I have seen then twice before, and am still unable to differentiate "hey are you in my 3rd or 4th per class? Or do you just really look like Billy?" Any student from another. I maybe recognize 1/3 of my class plus others from other periods. I think. Maybe.

So then we are lost and the map is oriented incorrectly and we line up in the wrong place. We are the last to line up and it is obvious. We are to line up somewhere between the 30-40 yard line but it is all full so we go to he 20th, as my. Line screams, new teacher over here, confused, wrong I every way, fire her.

Then we wait. We are to sit in single file line by classroom for an hour and a half. No potty breaks or talking to a friend three lines over or any activities or anything. Yeah freaking right. Add in an at risk population and voila recipe for disaster. My students won't sit. Without a seating chart, I only know maybe 5 names. I can't give them any "punishment" and they know that. No one can give referrals in the drill and cut isn't like you can give them work, call home, or anything. So kids begin to wander and not just my class. Two students went missing between the class and the field. My roll is taken away and I am sure the principals are gong over, yup she lost two kids who could lose two kids in the funnel two exits 2000 kids on their first official day? Geez, I mean anyone could keep track of 38 strangers on a field of 2,000 strangers, fire her!

So more wander. Again they're mostly strangers to me and so my line of 30-something is more of a clump, being the last line, unbound by the divisors of other classrooms. I keep the same basic number of kids but lose some and accumulate new ones. We're to have a buddy teacher, but no one knows who mine is. No one comes fort roll. Other teachers tell my students (or whoever they belong to) to sit down in a line and where is your teacher. Even kids I can assuredly tell you aren't mine point at me since I am new. I decide to spend our pointless time just making sure whoever is in my line, well, clump, is safe. If they leave it, not my issue because I cannot leave my line to chase after them and I can't call their names since I don't know them.

Finally the bell rings.

I nearly rolled into a ball and wept.

The first teacher quit after a month. Then there was a sub till a teacher void be found. Me.

I hope I last. Breaking a contract is like...suicide. You will never get a job again. Ever. But today sucked. If my son can't do daycare I will have to quit. If tomorrow isn't any better at work.....

Grr. I have taught before and it hasn't been the bad. Only when I was a sun with no power was it like this.

Oh And my pay, I get paid a certain yearly total divided monthly. Lets dream here, 120,000 yr or 10000 month. Since I didn't work for two, wasn't hired yet, my total is 100,000. 10,000 month. So the payroll tells me you won't be paid till December and then you get $5000 .
Huh? I get paid a month late for half if what I earned?

1 comment:

  1. Oh, honey, I am *so* sorry! All of that sounds awful. *big hugs*

    From an armchair's distance, I have all sorts of thoughts on what you "should" do. (Oh, who am I kidding? I'm still sitting in bed, but... ) And I've started to write some of them below - but really what you need is someone to hold you and pat you on the back telling you, "There, there, it will be all right." (And I realize that sounds more condescending in text than I intend - fortunately you know me well enough now to take it in the spirit it is meant). So, feel free to ignore the impracticalities of any "advice" I may give below, and just accepted it as empathetic venting.

    A part of me says you should just quit now after the first day to send them a message about how impossible they have made it, but I know it is not that simple, and that you have waited a long time to find a position. While I understand your concerns re: breaking a contract, I'd say you have two reasons to cite for why you did to explain in future situations. 1) the assignment is impossible - and frankly if an employer won't hire you because they have a similar assignment, you'll be better off, and 2) unexpected health care issues with your son.

    Frankly, I'd write a sternly worded letter explaining how the position they have put you in is impossible, and that you (or anyone who did that position) require more support - even if it's the ability to give consequences, a facebook guide of the kids, or many other things. That they have created a situation that is impossible for you to be effective. Either force them to make changes (I know it's still your first day) or tell them you will leave.

    Okay - maybe all of that is a little stern. But they should at least be aware that there's a problem if you're the third teacher in this spot this year. Articulate some clear things that the school can do (can they provide you a facebook of your students? can the principal or some administrator sit in your classroom to at least confirm you know your students?) to at least help you get situated while you get yourself situated. Or if you can't articulate it, tell them simply you need help? I dunno...

    Or, this weekend, plan a movie marathon of movies of teachers with impossible situations - Stand and Deliver, Freedom Writers, Dead Poets Society (oh, well maybe not impossible, but still...)!

    Either way, I am so sorry... This sucks. Do your best to keep your head up and know if this doesn't work out, it isn't you. Protect your son, and be a duck (let the water roll off your back..) Hoping today is better!!