Tuesday, August 12, 2014
no, I didn't eat those eggs you meticuously, lovingly made for me.
As my son has another screaming,, thrashing, banging things hour long tantrum....I feel...anxiety to say the least. A few days ago, I was filled with a similar anxiety but for the funkiest reason. Synasthesia. Some people cam smell colors or whqtever, which is what synasthesia "is", but aside from thinking "whoa, trippy", I wasn't 100% convinced it existed, but thought it would be neat to have. Wrong. I realized I have synasthesia but where emotions have a taste. No joke. So my husband lovingly prepared breakfast, scrambled organic eggs with slices of artisan salami and mozarella mixed in. How lovely and "umami" and gourmet right? What a nice husband! Well my lovely husand was disappointed when, an hour later, he came out to see my plate of eggs untouched. It so happens, synasthesia got in the way. I couodnt quite exlain it to him as he'd think I was nuts. But come to find out, anxiety tastes like eggs mixed with mozarella and salami. The second I took a bite, my whole being flooded with extreme anxiety. So, not "getting" it, I took another bite as my husband carried his plate to his office to eat and work. The anxiety increased. I paused, fed a bite to my kiddos, had a sip of coffee which washed away the taste. The eggs had a pleasant taste in a way, so I took a small experimental nibble and bam! The coffee had rinsed away my anxiety and the nibble of eggs brought it flooding back. I went to swish my mouth with mouthwash, scotch, chocolate milk, potato chips, all to try and overpower any hint of "anxiety eggs". And so I thought, hmm...this just has to be nuts. But I recall hating brocolli as a kid because it reminded me of being sick, so plain brocolli (as in, steamed and unadorned, how it was served to me as a kid, or, raw brocolli) still tastes like the feeling of being sick to me. So it must be synasthesia.